Love Me Tinder

World Cup time at last, and even if I wasn’t taking a week off, active dating would now be taking a back seat. Ah I love these international football tournaments, I remember, as I leaf through the free newspaper supplements and start to plan my time around the matches. The tournament is taking place in […]

A Tindercation

Rik Mayall’s death earlier this week has sent my entire generation into mourning. Just as soon as I have a minute I’m going to get The Young Ones and the relevant Blackadder episodes on DVD so I can play them to the bright young things, I decide. We can have a barter economy: I show […]

Tinder Looks

“You remind me of a young Rupert Everett,” I write to Florian, a 25 year old Parisian banker. “Who?” He texts back. “English actor. Was the next big thing in the 80s until his lifestyle overshadowed his acting. Ex best friend of Madonna. Worked as a male escort…” “Has he been in anything recently?” “Um, […]

TinderStick and Ball

When you return to the fray after a year off dating, it feels how Dorothy must have felt going from the black and white of Kansas to the bright technicolor of Oz. Everything is shiny and new. You are thrilled by the incessant buzzing of texts and Tinder messages in your phone. Your heart jumps […]

Tinder Hearts

“I’ve been shopping for some tools for work and some household stuff: like tee-ow-ills,” Jason the 26 year old Australian cabinet maker tells me. We re waiting for our lunch at L’Artista in Golders Green. “Some what?” I ask. “You know, tee-ow-ills,” he says. He speaks softly and has a strong Melbourne accent. “What are […]


Flicking through the high summer Bravissimo (D to J cup underwear) catalogue, I feel despondent. Its quarterly arrival used to be an exciting day as I stuck post it notes all over it and then ordered new bright, patterned bras. Now, of course, I can’t wear underwired bras due to my scars and thinner, irradiated […]

UninTindered Consequences: Act II

Arriving at the bar early, I request a table on the terrace. “There’s a £25 per person minimum spend,” the waitress said. “Which is equivalent to about two drinks each.” “Ok,” I say, thinking that I’ll ask Freddy when he arrives what he thinks as it’s so much more pleasant on the terrace than inside. […]

Tinder Surprise

Having never spent much time on any dating website apart from J Date – the Jewish one – Tinder is in some ways a surprise. I’ve set the age search parameters to 25 – 45 and there is a preponderance of younger ones: one article gave the average age of Tinder users as 27 and […]