Never heard from Billy the Priest about our date which was meant to occur this Wednesday. Towards the end of our first date, he said “when can I see you next week?”
“How about Wednesday?” I said, smiling.
“Excellent, what?” He said. “I will find something really exciting for us to do on Wednesday.”
When I woke up the next morning, he’d messaged me to say: “lovely to meet you, Tanya. Sleep well.”
I replied “brilliant to meet you too. Await Wednesday with much excitement.”
And then Nothing.
As Wednesday came and went, I started to write a feedback questionnaire for the chaps. Would love to send this to them to be filled in after the first date.
FIRST DATE FEEDBACK FORM
(Candidates should write on at least one side of the paper)
1. What is your name?
2. Do you consider yourself a Bright Young Thing? If so, why?
3. When you said that you wanted to meet up again, was this:
a. Out of a sense of politeness
b. To pave the way for some sexuals that you were about to attempt
c. You were drunk and on sober reflection realised that you didn’t want to meet up again
d. You tell all the ladies that you want to see them again
e. All of the above
f. Other (please elaborate)
4. Did I say or do anything that put you off me or is there just too much choice? Be honest
5. Who are these people: Richard Burton, Rupert Everett, Elizabeth Taylor
(Candidates should not attempt to write on both sides of the paper at once)
6. Is that your own willy in the photo or is it one gleaned from the Central Willy Database. Be truthful.
N.B. Candidates over thirty need not attempt question 2