A Tindspector Calls

“I think you’re very attractive but your features are quite masculine,” the Tinder message flashes up. It’s from one of the Bright Young Things, one I haven’t chatted to yet.
“Thank you?” I reply. “Obviously, I’m a girl.”
“Can you send more photos?” The chap replies.
“OK,” I say, “what’s app?”
“Sure,” he says.
Scrolling through my photos, I attach a few: one in the multicoloured striped dress, a couple in the orange dress, one in a green dress.
“I’m still not sure,” the message comes back.
“Seriously?” I reply. “I’ve never encountered this particular worry before!” On the heels of CatBoy asking me if I’ve been sectioned, this one is asking me if I’m a bloke!
“I think you’re really attractive but I’m confused. Can you send a bikini photo so I can make sure?” He fires back.
“Who has photos of themselves in a bikini apart from teenagers and reality TV people?” I say.
“Don’t be shy,” he messages back.
“I’m not shy. I just don’t think it’s appropriate,” I say.
“I’m sure you do alright for yourself. I’d love to have a closer look,” his message comes back.
“I’m not sending a bikini photo. Sorry,” I say.

Thinking about it afterwards, I realise his line of questioning must simply be a ruse to garner bikini photos. He probably does it to everyone. It’s rattled me though. Gazing at my photos, I wonder what about them makes me look masculine. The toned arms, the long wig, the make-up…actually I don’t care. Putting this to the back of my mind, I hit Tinder again.

Tonight’s chap has cancelled – yay – due to “problems with his ex”. Can’t help feeling relieved: had misgivings about him.

Don’t want to give too much away, in case it doesn’t happen, but there’s a potential chap on Monday evening. He’s 36, 6 foot 4, likes cats and we’ve been chatting today. Hopefully he won’t think I’m a man who has been sectioned. That will be progress!

Wish me luck?

6 thoughts on “A Tindspector Calls

  1. “Hopefully he won’t think I’m a man who has been sectioned. ”
    That’s the dating dream right there! Haha.
    Ignore that rude chap, he was obviously just trying to get pics of you in a bikini because he thinks you’re well hot and definitely not a man.
    Good luck for next date xxx


  2. Oh Man! I’m sorry if inappropriate but that made me laugh so bad! Just the way you described it! Good you have that sense of humour of yours! He sounded well dodgy BTW! P.S You do not look like a Man!! Take it from someone who knows these things!! x x x


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