Welcome To The Jungle

The messaging continues with the Twitcher but no third date has yet been arranged. “I’m about to descend into a stag do of doom,” the message flashes across my screen yesterday lunchtime. Let’s hope that he enjoys himself and surfaces from it wanting to see me. Haven’t heard from Seb for a couple of weeks. […]

The Tale Of Samuel Whiskers

“You’re so beautiful, my fluffy monster,” I tell him as he lies in my arms, purring. It’s an impressive purr: the rumble of a little steam engine. Stroking his head, I look down at him and notice something very strange and unsettling. “Mum,” I say. “Someone has cut off all his whiskers on one side.” […]

Some Hope?

“Let’s have a look, shall we?” My plastic surgeon says. He pulls the blue plastic curtain around us. Slipping my top off, I look down at the flat right side of my chest. It’s healed up beautifully. “That looks good,” he says. “It’s healed very well. What did your oncologist say?” “He says that it’s […]

Night Train

“It’s lovely here,” I say. I’m with the Twitcher in an amazing place. Maybe trains used to sleep here at night: we’re in Kings Cross. The restaurant has a high vaulted ceiling and a life size photo of a train on the back wall. “I’m glad you like it,” he says, smiling at me. He […]

Pond Life

I’m in a concert hall with a couple of my schoolfriends. There’s a huge pond in the middle of the auditorium chocked with pondweed and green with algae. There are huge koi and pike swimming in the murky depths of the pond. As I’m bending over to look at the fish, the softie falls out […]

Scar Tissue

“What’s that?” Suzie says, pointing at my chest. Looking down, I see that my softie has worked its way out of my bra and is about to dive into my supper. “Ah, it’s my fabric pretend boob,” I say, pushing it back inside my bra. It had better not do that on my second date […]

Mrs Beeton’s Book Of Household Management

Waking with a start, I switch the light on. 5.35pm. Suzie will be here for dinner at 7pm. “You haven’t got time to write your blog,” the panther says, stretching his front paws down the bed, pushing his bottom up to the ceiling. “I’ll write my blog first,” I tell him. “You need to tidy […]

November Rain

“Where’s the fluffy monster?” I ask Mum, watching the rain tumble down the windows. His apricot paws will be getting wet out there. “He’s either in or out,” Mum says as she puts plates and knives and forks on the table. We’re having a proper lunch because my brother is here: returned from Abroad to […]

The Miller’s Tale

“There has been a mill on this site for over a thousand years,” the information poster inside the restaurant tells us. “It’s lovely here, isn’t it?” I say to Dad. We’re on our first bike ride since my operation a month ago and we’ve taken a new route and found ourselves at this old water […]

After The Dance

Have managed to secure a second date with the Twitcher! It is scheduled for next Wednesday, so let’s hope we’re still alive by then. “Am I right in assuming that Friday is tricky?” He messages yesterday, when we start discussing the possible day for our date. “Yes. Dinner with parentals. Sorry,” I say. Yes, am […]