A Woman Of Substance

“Hope you had a divine day, you are a mini genius with sinful pins x”. The Whatsapp message snakes across my screen. It’s from MediaChap. “Thank you. Hope the course was good. Had such a lovely time the other night,” I say. He’s doing a video-editing course, or at least that’s what I think he […]

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Not Dead, Only Resting

“How are you today?” My plastic surgeon says, beaming his huge smile. “Yeah, OK I think,” I say. “Oh, I’m sorry – I forgot my device. Mum’s just signing in – there was a queue and…” “Don’t worry, Tanya, I’ve got a spare one,” the nurse says, reaching into the depths of her trolley and […]

The Stud

“So, at the guide dog centre, they’re showing us around,” MediaChap says. “They bring one of the studs out to meet us. And he’s a gorgeous big yellow Labrador but he’s in a bad mood: usually when he comes out of his room it’s to mate, and now he’s got to meet a whole lot […]

Dressed To Kill

Before leaving the house for tonight’s date with MediaChap, need to: 1. Have bath and even wash hair. 2. Clean contact lenses: am one of the last people in the world who still wears gas-permeable lenses. Can’t just open a packet and take out some new lenses: have to mess about with two different solutions […]

In Bruges

Have a Date tonight: first one for a couple of weeks. Am nervous as he looks absolutely gorgeous in his photos. He’s half-Belgian/half-Danish: lots of shaggy brown hair, great cheekbones, wide mouth with naughty grin, hazel eyes. He’s not a Bright Young Thing either: this one is forty. A man of Experience. Works in telecoms […]

Shot At Dawn

MediaChap: I’m so up for a gentle time, you should have no fear of me x If you like we can get a table near the bar so people can keep a keen eye on me and make sure we behave ourselves. *Tanya wonders who are these people and what sort of misbehaviour MediaChap would […]

Murder Must Advertise

“You’re not going to make it to the office tomorrow,” the panther says. “You’ve been asleep almost all weekend, when you’re awake you’re crying and…” “You’re wrong,” I tell him. “Am looking forward to getting my teeth into some Work tomorrow.” “You’ll be late, your boss will be cross with you. Just stay here with […]

Puppy Love

“Puppy power,” the WhatsApp message arrives. It’s from MediaChap. Opening it, I see a basket of golden Labrador puppies. “Puppy love,” the next message says and a puppy is pushing a wet nose towards me. “Ahhhh puppies. What do you do with them?” I say. “Hug them and look after them,” MediaChap replies. “Where are […]

The Clocks

“Hi,” the WhatsApp message dances across my screen. It’s from NewChap – the one from Richmond. Our second date is tonight. “Massively busy at work so need to postpone tonight. The rest of the week looks no better, can we do next week?” Looking at the time on my phone, I see that it’s 5pm […]