“I want someone to share my life” screams the headline of the Evening Standard. “Prince Harry today spoke of how he wants to find the love of his life to settle down and have children.”
My Prince Harry! Ah how sweet. Hope he meets someone wonderful very soon then. Would offer to do it myself but:
1. Have an amazing boyfriend.
2. Can’t have children and don’t want them anyway.
3. Am probably not his type: he likes blonde actresses I think.
No, wait a minute: am putting self down. Mustn’t. Will apply for the vacancy anyway and then just worry about all those things once have secured the position. Will just send a nice application letter, telling him that had a dream that we were together and that I know how to feed the special biscuits to the deer at Balmoral:
We can talk about wildlife: he likes elephants and rhinos and so on. Will enclose a photo of the fluffy monster with the caption: ‘Look: we have already produced a feline child: he has your orange hair’.
My bad arm hurts and is a bit swollen. It’s possible that I scratched it cycling through brambles with Dad the other day. Can’t see any cuts or grazes, but there you go.
Happy Monday everyone!
*2010. By Rhys Bowen. Number 4 in the ‘Her Royal Spyness’ mystery series starring Lady Georgiana Rannoch.