Turtle Baby*

Happy Bipolar Awareness Day everyone! Am aware of my mental disorder everyday, of course.  So are my parentals and my brother.  There’s never a day that isn’t dominated by my mood – even after sixteen years of illness, treatment, coping strategies and so on.

When my mood is up – which is around 60% of the time, for a five month stretch – this is a constant source of concern to the parentals.  Can be a danger to myself in this mood state.  Also am more annoying to them.

When my mood is low – for about 40% of the time – a three to four month stretch – am plagued by the panther and life is a constant struggle.  Am in that period of low mood now.  

Can’t overemphasise how completely this mental disorder and its treatments and effects have dictated my life and choices.  And am one of the lucky ones: still have a job; parentals who look after me and have some quality of life.  Am able to write, exercise and cuddle my fluffy monster.

When I was first diagnosed, Dr Stein said “most of my patients go on to lead a normal life.”  Have never met anyone with my illness who leads a normal life.

Anyway: have to prepare to alight from the bus in the rain.

The passionflower in the attached photo lives near my Office.

Happy Tuesday everyone!
*1996.  By Abigail Padgett.  Book 3 in the Bo Bradley detective series.  Bo is a detective with Bipolar disorder.

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