Towards Zero*

“If he wins, Andy and Kim will have to call the baby Davis,” I say to Seb. We’re in the nest in front of the television, and Andy is leading David Goffin 6 – 3, 7 – 5, 5 – 3.  Kim Murray is due to give birth in February. “Or David,” Seb says, as […]

Killer Instinct*

“Have set off,” Seb’s message comes through at 11.13am, “but will be after lunch arrival.  A while after.  Sorry xxx.” “That’s OK my love,” I reply, on my return from a bike ride with Dad.  “The doubles starts at 2pm.  I go back to flat to prepare for it.” Andy and Jamie Murray must win […]

The Golden Spiders*

The flat phone rings at about 9.30pm last night, just as I’m watching Andy Murray versus Bernard Tomic, recorded earlier in the day.  I already know that Andy won, and that we’re now in the Davis Cup final, but I missed the match. “Hello,” I say. “Hello my lovely,” Seb says.  “I’ve just arrived.” “So […]

Levels Of The Game*

“This is a deep hole he’s in right now,” the commentator says.  Andy Murray is struggling against Gilles Simon.  He’s a set and a break down. Am suffering with Andy.  Come on Andy! MadFatRunner has been here with me this weekend and we had a lovely time but now she has gone home and am […]

Deadly Doubles*

And now from the clay courts of Roland Garros to the real action: the Friday Morning Veteran Ladies’ Doubles match at Mum’s grass court tennis club.  Well: it’s AstroTurf rather than real grass, but here we are, with the ladies Dressed Properly in white dresses and white trainers and…hang on a minute…one of them is […]

Murder On The Eiffel Tower*

“D’you know, he could win this,” John Inverdale says.  It’s the French Open and Andy Murray hasn’t yet hit a ball.  Let’s not tempt fate and make him lose in the first round to a qualifier, I think.  Probably best not to start to thinking about Andy-winning-the-whole-tournament at this stage. And they’re off.  Andy’s clad […]

A Vindication Of The Rights Of Woman*

Happy International Women’s Day everyone.  Unfortunately am spending it: making self look pretty for my Seb; cooking, cleaning and waiting for him.  He is, of course, running late: he’s lost his phone and so on.  As MadFatRunner says, am “a slave to the Patriarchy.” “He does seem to have a somewhat calamitous relationship to logistics,” […]

The Field Of Blood*

“It’s a suffocating performance from Andy Murray,” the commentator says.  I’m watching the Davis Cup with the parentals.  Andy is pulverising the American Donald Young: he’s just taken the first two sets in thirty minutes or so.  Andy’s looking fit, tough and untroubled by his back or his opponent.  Which is good.  It’s a riotous […]

Cuts Through Bone

“The standard: incredible at the moment. Both players playing their best tennis,” the commentator says. Novak took the first set 7 – 6 in the tiebreak and now it’s 5 – 5 in the second set. Andy is serving. They’ve been playing for two hours and fourteen minutes. Just watching it is exhausting. Am under […]