The Diary Of A Killer Cat*

“Looking forward to seeing you, lovely.  Can I bring anything later? xxx” Seb’s message comes through at 1.21pm today as I’m sitting at my desk in my Office. “Balsamic vinegar please,” I say.  Am running low on this and need it for the artichokes.  Could, and probably should, purchase it myself, but it is good […]

The Fugitive Pigeon*

“How is my fluffy?” I ask Mum when I call to let the parentals know that have made it to my Office.  If I don’t call, they just assume that am Still In Bed or have snuck off to the gym. “He’s a very naughty boy,” Mum says, in her Teacher Voice. “What has he […]

The Name Of The Rose*

“Hello lovely!” Seb’s message arrives at 12.51pm today.  “My Mum has changed her mind about her collection from hospital and my stepdad is going to do it instead.  Have to clean my flat as the agents want to show it.  Am going to head up to you first thing tomorrow.  Buzz you later. xxx” “Woohoo […]

Flowers For Her Grave*

“Do you think I’m too old for these,” I say to Seb as we walk past a market stall selling silk flower headbands.  Seb has come to my Office to take me out to lunch before he returns home this evening. Have been thinking about these flower headbands since first noticed them around in the […]

Heartbreak Tennis*

“I’ll let you know my movements but definitely see you later,” Seb’s message. Seb is coming back this evening.  Can’t wait to arrive home, switch on actual Wimbledon and put the artichokes on to boil.  Mum is on Centre Court – maybe will see her on the television. This morning Seb travelled with me to […]

Strange Days*

It’s been a strange day full of some unsettling things.  So, here are some nice things: 1.  Love my Seb. 2.  Will spend some proper time with him soon. 3.  Enjoyed this evening’s artichoke.   4.  And a spinach, beetroot, avocado and sweetcorn salad. 5.  This Rioja is good. 6.  Enjoyed my allergy doctor.  Am […]

Neon Panic*

Waking up with a start I see that it’s 6.33pm and I haven’t yet made a start on the day’s tasks.  After gym this morning I had a lunch meeting and then my sleep, so have to do Everything now. Crawling through to the kitchen, I boil the kettle, chop the stem off my artichoke, […]

Trouble Is My Business*

Painventory 1.  Cramp in left leg – down the side and around the knee, but on the inside – the inner knee.  No idea how/ why this has happened. 2.  Blocked nose: new allergy that am going to see a specialist about in three weeks, by which time it will probably have killed me.  Although […]

The Art Of Killing Well*

“I couldn’t wait to get to the market today to see if there were any artichokes,” I say to Seb when he calls this evening. “And were there?” He says. “Yes!  I bought two and now I’m cooking one,” I say.   “So it’s not like that time on your birthday,” Seb says, sounding amused, […]

Game, Set and Murder*

  “What a beautiful person he is!  Happy day?xxx”   At the theatre, I’ve turned my phone on during the interval, and can see Seb’s message.  The ‘beautiful person’ referred to is, of course, the fluffy monster.  Sent Seb a couple of fluffy-monster-photos earlier in the day. Can’t reply though because in the ten minutes before the start of […]