The Sea, The Sea*

Seb is still asleep.  Have been awake since 7.20am.  It’s now 10.01am.  Don’t understand how he can sleep for sooooooo long in the morning.   Sunlight streams through the thin curtains.  Can hear the roar of the sea and the screeching of the gulls. We’re missing a beautiful day out there.  Just want to walk […]

Tears Of The Giraffe*

“What time is it?” Seb says.   Turning to look at my watch, I say “it’s six fifty.  I’ve just woken up and am with my darling Seb. “I’d better get up and help my mum with moving some chairs,” he says. Oh good, I think.  He doesn’t want to go back to sleep.  I’m […]

Neon Panic*

Waking up with a start I see that it’s 6.33pm and I haven’t yet made a start on the day’s tasks.  After gym this morning I had a lunch meeting and then my sleep, so have to do Everything now. Crawling through to the kitchen, I boil the kettle, chop the stem off my artichoke, […]

Trouble Is My Business*

Painventory 1.  Cramp in left leg – down the side and around the knee, but on the inside – the inner knee.  No idea how/ why this has happened. 2.  Blocked nose: new allergy that am going to see a specialist about in three weeks, by which time it will probably have killed me.  Although […]

Deadly Doubles*

And now from the clay courts of Roland Garros to the real action: the Friday Morning Veteran Ladies’ Doubles match at Mum’s grass court tennis club.  Well: it’s AstroTurf rather than real grass, but here we are, with the ladies Dressed Properly in white dresses and white trainers and…hang on a minute…one of them is […]

Cat Of Many Tails*

Happy First Birthday to this blog. Wow.  When I started it a year ago, I could never have imagined that it would take off in such a spectacular way.  It’s been discussed on the radio, on film and in print.  It has readers all over the world. So, thank you, all of you.  Thank you […]

Murder By The Seaside*

“I’m looking forward to seeing my dogs,” Seb says as we leave his flat. “I’m looking forward to seeing all the animal people,” I say.  The fluffy monster’s mum and uncle and two sisters will be there, along with the three dogs.  Am wearing my nice dress: the short leopard and tiger print red, gold, black […]

Flashman’s Lady*

“So, there’s a train strike planned for Monday,” I tell Seb when he calls yesterday.  “So, um, what shall I do about returning home?”   “Why don’t you book a train ticket to go back on Sunday night then?” He says.  “I need to work on Monday – I’ve just discovered that I do have […]

Birthdays For The Dead*

“I’d like the new Peter Ackroyd Hitchcock biography.  Or the new Kate Atkinson.  For my birthday,” I say to my brother.  He’s shaving his head over the sink, with an electric device.  There’s a loud buzzing.  He probably can’t hear me. “What’s that?” He shouts, turning  off the electric shaver, lifting his head up. “You’ve […]

Machines Of Easy Virtue*

Seb is engaged in a duel with the computer.  He is trying to sort out how to watch a film on the TV, using the HDMI cable.   “Look, I’ve got the screen bigger now, show you,” I say.  Am proud of my newfound ability to use the Screen button. “But the picture is not […]