A Hell Of A Dog*

“Hello,” I say to the Akita and his owner.  We’re at my pub: where I used to bring the chaps on all those dates last year. “Hi,” the owner says. “He’s amazing,” I say.  “What’s his name?” “He’s called Onyx,” the owner says.  He’s a skinny chap and Onyx himself is a large person.  Beautiful […]

The Triple Petunia Murder Case*

“I like my colour scheme, don’t you?” Mum says.  We’re sitting on the terrace in the parental garden, and all around us are petunias of different pinks and purples:         “They’re stunning,” I say.  “What about those pink-and-green-ones from last year?” “Couldn’t get any this year,” Mum says.  “Asked at the garden centre, but […]

Deadly Doubles*

And now from the clay courts of Roland Garros to the real action: the Friday Morning Veteran Ladies’ Doubles match at Mum’s grass court tennis club.  Well: it’s AstroTurf rather than real grass, but here we are, with the ladies Dressed Properly in white dresses and white trainers and…hang on a minute…one of them is […]

Killer Instinct*

Waking from a three hour afternoon sleep, I crawl through to the television on switch it on.  Serena is losing.  She lost the first set 4 – 6 and although she is roaring and slamming down the serves, she’s not comfortable today.   It’s 2 – 2 in the second set and Serena is serving […]

The Cat Who Sang For The Birds*

“What’s the fluffy monster doing?” I ask Mum when I call to inform her that I’ve left the Office. “He’s telling me that he wants his supper,” Mum says. Can hear the sound of her shaking some dry food into his bowl. “Hello Mr Fluffy,” I say. “Say hello to Tanya,” Mum says to him. […]

The Malice Of Fortune*

“You need all the fortune you can get playing Nadal,” the commentator says.  Another bright, sunny day in Paris.  Rafa resplendent in turquoise all over – down to his socks and shoes.  Am enjoying his new style of shorts: short and tight.  They’re a long way away from those grey baggy monstrosities of his youth. […]