Seb still loves me, I think, and a warm glow suffuses my whole self. As long as we are together, nothing is that bad. Can’t wait to see him and cuddle him and talk to him. Can’t wait to cook him The Omelette. Haven’t managed to learn to cook any new dishes, but after […]
“Hello lovely, all well?” Seb’s message comes through at 6.30pm last night. “Very good here. Despite all my self abuse, meditation’s going pretty well. You keep popping into my mind during meditation. Sending loving thoughts xxx” “Sending loving thoughts back,” I fire off, just in case he can read it straight away. “You are in […]
“Arrived safe and sound, by the way xxx”. The message comes through from Seb at 12.45pm today. Am so happy to hear from him. Have been wondering whether or not he’s arrived. “Ah great. In Bangkok?” I reply, at 2.10pm when I see the message. Am at the parental home where there isn’t much phone […]
“What are your measurements, Tanya?” Seb says as he’s packing his huge rucksack this morning. “Is it OK if I leave this shirt here?” “Of course,” I say, taking the shirt from him. It’s my favourite one: big blue and grey checks and it feels soft. Am pleased that it will be here so I […]
“It’s strange,” Seb says as we walk from the bus stop to my Office, “remembering the time when I lived here. It was a difficult time – I was in a bad mental state.” We’ve just passed the road where he was living when we met ten years ago. “I wasn’t,” I say. “I was […]
“I have set off my lovely,” Seb’s message comes through at 12.07pm today. “But will still be a while. May miss the start of the tennis. See you in a bit.” He is coming to see me. And am here in front of my television so it doesn’t matter when he arrives. “Yay! Can’t wait […]
“I will drive you home today,” Seb says. He is wearing his grey vest that he puts on to channel Marlon Brando as Stanley in Streetcar. Somehow it makes him look even more posh though: his mane of hair flopping over his face and his big, turquoise eyes. He has such a kind, open face. […]
“Aren’t you going to have a wash for our first meeting with your parents as an actual couple?” Seb says, a towel round his waist, hair slicked back. Ah he smells great: fresh and clean. “No,” I say, from the sofa where I am snuggled up watching Wimbledon. “Had a wash yesterday. They won’t expect […]
Painventory 1. Cramp in left leg – down the side and around the knee, but on the inside – the inner knee. No idea how/ why this has happened. 2. Blocked nose: new allergy that am going to see a specialist about in three weeks, by which time it will probably have killed me. Although […]
Seb is asleep in the nest. His arm is wrapped around me. He makes contented little sleeping noises. I don’t want him to go home, but he has college tomorrow and I have the Office and so we both need our sleep. On the television: Rafa has just beaten Jack Sock. Now Novak is playing […]
Scars, Tears and Training Bras 