A Kiss Before Dying

Things I love about Seb:
1. He’s always appreciative of any effort I make. He pronounced the Mexican Feast “wonderful”.
2. He’s easy to please – see above, and notices what I’m wearing etc.
3. He’s happy just to lie in the nest watching hours and hours of television.
4. He is completely beautiful – don’t have to make allowances for any physical imperfections as he doesn’t have any. His skin is as smooth as a marble statue and feels and smells amazing.
5. He has the most mellifluous voice.
6. He loves animals as much as I do.
7. He has simple tastes in food and so on. Is still wearing clothes that he wore ten years ago.
8. He is very kind and caring towards his family.
9. He is happy to spend time trying to please me in the bedroom.
10. And on the telephone. Talking about things I mean – not heavy breathing down it in manner of sex offender.
11. He is amazing to cuddle and the right height for me: we seem to fit together perfectly.
12. He has no interest in doing sexuals with other girls. He’s just spent six years being celibate: the last sexual encounter he had was with me in May 2009!
13. Which sent him off to the monastery for a week to cleanse himself. This time he seemed quite happy the next morning. So that is progress.
14. He is interested in my mind. And thinks am clever.
15. We have some interests in common: theatre, animals, meditation, conservation, war programmes, history of aviation
16. He doesn’t mind that am a bit fat.
17. He makes me laugh and doesn’t take himself too seriously.

Things That He Needs To Work On
1. Time-keeping
2. Organisation
3. Earning a living
4. Whether or not he wants to be celibate.
5. There are some gaping holes in his education: “I had no idea that Henry VIII was Elizabeth’s father” and “I thought that Oliver and Thomas Cromwell were the same person.”

These are small things though aren’t they?